I don't know why I remember running errands with my mom as a teen. It was the same every time - talk about boys and girl drama in the car, where we wanted to have lunch and why my mom was irritated with my dad lately. I remember the mountains to my right, glorious and... Continue Reading →
Grief
I never knew grief until that day, When I came home to find my brother Sobbing on the kitchen floor. His chest heaving with heartbreak, Desperate whimpers escaping his mouth. All I could do was stand there In complete and utter shock. “Jackie passed away this morning”. Those ugly words rang in my ears Jackie... Continue Reading →
Happiness
Happiness begins with living. With truly being free and comfortable in who you are. Happiness is yours to create. I used to grasp for people's hands, rely on other broken hearted people to ground me and make me feel - anything. Then, I lost the person I love. Then, I had to find myself again...... Continue Reading →
Dust to Dust
Alone in the garden I stumble upon an apple tree But this is no ordinary tree - no It has been in the family for generations This tree is strength, creation, protection, love… The tree sighs heavy breaths as it inhales and exhales The cool summer air. I breathe in sync with her Admiring her... Continue Reading →
You are my Poison
I can't stop myself from loving you, Even as you spit venom from your mouth, In between the sweet nothings That truly mean nothing at all. But they mean the world to me. I can't get enough. The venom hurts, then it burns, then it begins to corrode my veins. I feel my... Continue Reading →
What Do I Want?
It's been a year since I've asked myself, what do I want? I've been consumed with making a toxic relationship healthy, Consumed with making everyone happy and sometimes forgetting myself... I was content giving a man my all, loving him with my whole heart, Giving and giving and giving till there was nothing left to... Continue Reading →
Weak Heart
It feels like years since I last saw you, since I last held you... When I try to think about life without you, my heart can't handle it. I collapse from the brokenness, the shards stabbing my weak heart. I try to give it back to you, begging you to take my heart back. Please... Continue Reading →
Anxiety
Tossing & Turning Waiting for Morning Waiting for a Distraction Any Distraction My Ribs are Caving In Butterflies Racing in My Stomach My Heart Racing Faster When Will This End? I am Nervous I am Afraid I am Powerless The Anxiety in My Head Attacking My Body No Relief No Peace No... Continue Reading →
Her Spirit
Her spirit knows there is something wrong before it is physically manifested. She has anxious, looming thoughts and feelings about the future. At night, her body curls up as she dreams of the depressing inevitable. She awakes, shaking, feeling a tear slide down her cheek. "No", she begs. "Please no..." The days continue on, the... Continue Reading →
If Only He Loved Me…
If he loves me, he will try. If he loves me, he won't yell. If he loves me, he will communicate. If he loves me, he will listen. If he loves me, he won't leave. But - If he does not, he will walk away. If I love myself, I will not let his... Continue Reading →