1 Corinthians 13

Our love is patient,

Our love is kind.

It does not envy,

It does not boast.

Our love does not dishonor,

And it is not self seeking.

Our love keeps no records of wrong,

But forgives graciously.

Our love always protects,

Always trusts,

Always hopes,

Always perseveres.

This is the love we share.

A beautiful love that comforts,

Heals,

And succeeds when we work hard

To keep the love alive.

May God bless us

Every step of the way,

And continue to lead your heart

To mine.

Amen.

 

 

Come Back to Me…

My love, I know I’ve made mistakes,

I am flawed and I say stupid things and I let my emotions get the best of me…

But please,

Forgive me,

Come back to me.

Yes, this argument I have created,

This storm of whirling emotions and doubt,

Has hurt,

It has hurt both you and I.

I’m sorry.

But do not forget the love we share,

The incredible, joyous memories we have made together!

The nights of cuddling on the couch,

Watching hours upon hours of Netflix.

The dinners we have shared,

And the burnt food I cook that you graciously eat.

When I am near to you,

I feel safe.

I feel loved.

I feel happy.

Our adventures make me happy.

When I think of you, my love,

I smile, because I know you are the one.

I am sorry I have made a mess of things,

I just hope and pray that you will open your heart to me again.

That you won’t forget the beautiful relationship we have,

The memories,

The hopes for the future.

Please, don’t forget.

Come back to me…

God gave me You

My love for you is blinding.

It shields the depression that forces me to sink into darkness,

as if an anchor is tied to my foot.

But my love for you – it saves me.

It heals,

teaches,

and respects.

I see the good in life because of you.

I forgive – imagine that!

I live in the present with you,

I forget the past hurts and pains of this life,

All because God gave me you.

You, the love of my life.

You have saved me from myself.

You have encouraged me to grow & become the woman He wants me to be.

I thank God every day for you.

For the all consuming love we share…

 

My Love…

My love for you is consuming,

It is surrounding, comforting and all knowing.

My love for you gives life a sweetness,

One I have never tasted before.

A sweetness in the air I breathe,

It covers me in wings of confidence.

Wings of love.

I am covered in love.

 

With you I see color, vibrancy.

The sky is more blue

And I see smiles on every block.

My love for you has changed me.

 

This love, this powerful, indescribable

Malady of the heart has given me life.

My love for you makes me strive to be better,

Every moment that I can.

My love for you makes me want to write,

To sing,

To dance,

To cry tears of joy.

 

My love for you makes my world go round.

You are my world,

My love.

 

 

 

 

The Kiss

The kiss-

Oh that one kiss,
It changed my life 
Forever. 
It had been six months. 
Six long months since I knew 
I wanted you. 
I needed you. 
I craved you. 
Six suffocating months of swallowing my feelings,
Feigning hate because admitting my love for you was just too hard. 
You didn’t want me. 
I had to not want you either…
Six months. 
Then, 
You came to me. 
Everything changed in just a few moments- 
Oh those precious moments…
We talked. 
We argued. 
We made up. 
You held me, 
I wanted to cry. 
I didn’t know I could miss an embrace so badly.  
I didn’t want to let go. 
I didn’t want to lose you again  
You stared into my eyes, into my soul. 
You saw me, the real me, for the first time. 
Finally, your lips reunited with mine. 
So tender,
So strong,
So full of depth 
And emotion… 
Never have I experienced something so 
Mind boggling 
Beautiful 
Painful 
Passionate 
Exhilarating 
Intoxicating… 
My stomach turned in knots
Tears welled up in my eyes. 
I never wanted it to end,
The kiss 
That changed my life- 
Our lives 
Forever. 

Spiraling

Spiraling

Into madness.

My brain

So anomalistic

Idiosyncratic

Unparagoned

Encumbered.

It hurts

Oh how it hurts.

My thoughts

Cut through my mind

Sharp

Painful

Bloody…

I’m bleeding.

A cocaphony

In my brain.

Loud, confusing, caustic.

I’m spiraling

Down

Down

Deeper still.

Indelicate black tunnels

Pull me farther in.

I can’t see now.

I feel the ghosts

Of my past

Tug at me.

I’m pulling apart.

Spiraling into

Lurid dreams.

I’m not dreaming.

I’m failing.

I’m guilty, lost, crazed, unsure.

The spiral is long,

I’m still falling deeper,

Deeper still.

Talk to Me

Talk to me

Say something

One word

Just one

Please…

I need –

I need to know

Where you stand

With me.

Say something.

What do you feel,

What do you think,

What have I done wrong…

I want to explode

I want to rip my hair out

One by one.

These thoughts

They attack me

Like a swarm of bees

Like a hurricane

Like fire.

I’m burning

Slowly melting

into

Nothing.

My body shakes

With fear

Of what you’ll say.

But just say it.

My heart may shatter

My life may end

But I need to know.

Talk to me…

See Me

You don’t see me.

You see your expectations of me.

You see a version of me that you want,

Or expect me to be.

 

They say “She’s a whore”,

“She’s dumb”

“She’s a bitch”

“She’s selfish”…

You don’t see me.

 

I don’t fit into a box,

I’m hard to understand,

I’m uniquely me.

The world refuses to see me.

Refuses to even try to understand my heart

Because I don’t fit a “type”.

 

They force stereotypes onto me.

Bombard me with skewed perceptions,

Hideous expectations.

They make me believe the lies.

No one sees me.

 

It’s lonely,

Knowing that the world

Doesn’t want to see me.

People I thought were friends,

People I was in love with,

Never knew me.

They never tried.

 

I just want

Someone

To

See 

me… 

 

 

Magnets

Magnets.

They pull together.

One is drawn towards the other.

It is their nature.

You hold the magnets just close enough, you can’t pull them apart.

The draw is too strong.

 

We pulled apart.  It felt unnatural.  Sudden.

Yet, the draw is there.

You came back.

I never left.

 

We tried so hard to move one, to live our lives apart.

But now, here we are.

Staring into each other’s eyes hating and loving how strongly we care for each other.

How connected we are.

It’s in our nature.

 

We tried to force a change.  But like magnets, we were made for this connection.

We couldn’t pull apart successfully.  We came back together.

You were drawn to me despite everything.

I’m drawn to you.  To your spirit.  To your heart.

My heart tugs and pulls in your direction no matter how hard I try to fight it.

 

I’m linked to you.  We are linked together.

Our spirits can’t help but come back together.  They tug at us till we are joined again.

Like magnets, we can’t help it.

This force that is inexplicably powerful.

This force that brings me back to you.

 

 

 

Glass

Glass hearts, so fragile, so easy to break.

Broken glass.

My heart is shattered.  Shards of broken pieces stab my insides.  Moving forward hurts.  Moving backwards hurts more.

Maybe I love the feeling of pain.  Maybe I love brokenness and depression because it makes me feel something.

Maybe I love getting hurt over and over again because I deserve it.

Maybe I love giving a piece of myself to people so freely…

Broken pieces of my heart trail behind me.  A part of me I gave to someone.  Someone who didn’t want it.  A part of me is broken.  A sliver of my heart missing…

In the pain, I see in blue.  The world is bleak; more so am I.

I’m angry.  I’m furious.

I’m fragile.

I see in red.  I bleed anger, frustration, hate.

I bleed brokenness.

I bleed from the cuts of broken glass.

I bleed for my heart.

I am broken.

I am glass.

 

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